2008, the best year in decades
2008 has been one of the best years ever… in so many ways. So much has changed and changed me, to push me further and faster forward. I don’t think I’ve felt this good, this motivated or this happy about where I am in at least 20 years.
- I’ve finally released myself from the shackles of my marriage after spending 3 years and ~$40k slogging it through the courts to keep my daughter in my life. I was with my girlfriend-then-wife for 8 years, and realized over time that she wasn’t the person I married. I also refuse to tolerate adultery in my marriage, so I ended it. Being single and alone for over 3 years is tough, but not a permanent problem.
- I’ve created a bond with my daughter that transcends words and sign language. She’s coming into her own and is learning some new abilities to “talk” and “listen” without using words or traditional language as we know it. She’s a beautiful, amazing little girl with an eye-opening list of skills and abilities, even at her tender age. Sure, life as a single father is difficult and challenging, but I’ll sacrifice whatever I need to, for her to grow up happy, healthy and reaching any goal she wants for herself.
- I’ve met some interesting and amazing people this year, some of which who have shown me facets of myself that long lay dormant, atrophied or discarded as unreachable anymore. The good, bad and ugly were all on display this year. Michele, Marci, Jennifer, Valerie, Lilibeth, Amy, Allena, Rachel, Pat & Lisa, Casey and the rest of the Edwards family and many others; you all know who you are, and in some small and large ways, you’ve made a permanent impact on my life. The genie is out of the bottle, and isn’t going back in.
- I work with a great group of people in Manhattan, doing some really cool things with technology and environments that I’ve worked with and supported for 15+ years. I wouldn’t give this up for the world at any price. I truly love what I do. I do what I do for free, I just collect a salary to pay for all of the things I don’t necessarily like doing. Ed, Phil, Dennis and others; let’s hope the fun can continue through 2009 as it did in 2008.
- After 16 years of searching inside my head for the lost memories from the first 20 years of my life, I’ve recovered what I believe to be more than half of them, all in the last 10 months or less. Remembering “other people’s” memories is a bit disconcerting, but it’s all part of the process. There’s plenty more work to be done, but after believing that bad car accident in 1992 permanently robbed me of those memories, I now know I can get back those years and begin recovering who I was, and what made me who I am today. Not only have those memories come flooding back, but I’m also able to retain thousands of bits of information at what seems to be a geometric rate, bordering on eidetic. It’s like my brain went from knowing nothing, to limitlessly absorbing everything.
There’s a lot more work to do in 2009 and years beyond, but I have no doubt I’ll be able to step up to any challenge that life throws at me. I’ve survived horrible accidents, sadness, strife and plight in all manner of ways, and I’ve always come through on top, always looking ahead, never behind.
I feel as if a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders and the metaphorical “smog” I was breathing, impeding my oxygen flow is now gone. I can stand tall, inhale clean, fresh air and move forward again.
I’m coming out of a 16-year coma and I’m just waking up.